Over six years ago I lost my dad to lung cancer which had traveled to his brain. He was a healthy forty-nine year old man, he never smoked, and he worked out twice a day. Then one afternoon, seconds after hanging up the phone with me, he had a seizure, and that started our year long journey of slowly losing him.
It seemed unjust--he took good care of his body, why would cancer take root in him? And he was more than just physically healthy, he was spiritually healthy. I have never met anyone who burned so passionately for God. My father was tireless and relentless-studying the Bible every chance he got. He loved apologetics and kept up to date with all the new scientific, historic, and even emotional evidence for God. And he NEVER missed an opportunity to talk to someone about God’s truth. Quite frankly being around him could be exhausting--the man literally only slept four hours a night. But the point is, when my dad passed away, my world became impossibly quiet and empty. Who would be there to fight the battles he never shied away from? Who would be there as backup for me when I took on battles of my own? Why would God see fit to take this type of man--my father--out of the world?
Not only did this question rise up in my own soul--it came at me from almost everyone I talked to after his death. Everyone around me was worried I would lose my faith in God because he had let my father die. And many of them were struggling with their own faith because of this as well. Fortunately for me, my dad--and his love for apologetics--had already prepared me to know the answer to this question. And I was incredibly grateful he had, because as C.S. Lewis said:
“Faith is the art of holding on to what our reason has once accepted, in spite of our changing moods.”
In times of emotional turmoil we need to hang on to the truth that keeps us anchored. So, let me share with you the truth that anchored me:
I’ll ask the question again:
if God is real, why does He let people die?
Well there is one huge problem with this reasoning--God never promised us that we wouldn’t die. In fact, He promised exactly the opposite--everyone dies. First we die; and after that we live forever.
Hebrews 9:27 (KJV) And it was appointed unto men once to die; but after this the judgment.
Everyone dies. God has not broken any promises when He lets people die. He has simply allowed what He said would happen, to happen. Ever since Adam and Eve brought death and decay into our world, death has been part of the bargain.
Some people claim death is proof that God doesn’t exist. But that is unreasonable, it means their logic would have to go something like this:
God says everyone dies → People die → So God doesn’t exist
It’s like saying:
The weatherman says it will rain → it rained → So the weatherman doesn’t exist
These are illogical conclusions. Death, if anything, is proof that God is real and is honest with us about what is coming our way. And God gave us the Bible to help prepare us for that death.
Of course, this leads us to another question:
What’s up with the timing? Why would God take one of His most prolific “players” out of “the game” while he was still so young?
I know it’s hard to understand why God chooses to extend some lives while seeming to cut others short. The only answer I have for this is to say we have to find a way to put things into perspective. To see things--not from our own grief-riddled opinions--but from the lens of the reality we exist in. We need to focus on the truths we know:
1) God is all-knowing: He sees things we cannot see. He knows the big picture. We are finite beings who can’t even know what the next hour of our life will bring us. But God existed before time began. He created time and brought us into being. He knows how each of our lives's threads weave together to create a marvelous tapestry.
Colossians 1:17 (ESV) He is before all things, and in Him all things hold together.
Psalm 100:3 (NASB) Know that the Lord Himself is God; It is He who has made us, and not we ourselves; We are His people and the sheep of His pasture.
2) God is all-loving: For reasons I cannot even begin to comprehend--God loves us. He has proven time and time again that He loves us. He even went so far as to suffer and die on the cross for us.
“God is Love” Voss Creative Artworks
Romans 8:35, 37-39 (NLT) Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean He no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death? ... No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us. And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow — not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below — indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.
I know it can be extremely hard to do, but since God knows things about the world’s timeline that we don’t have any clue about--and since we know beyond a shadow of a doubt that He loves us--we have to trust that God knows what He is doing and has our best interests at heart, even when life hurts.
This is when people come across a pitfall:
Does being sad about death mean my faith is weak?
No, it is not wrong to cry or mourn. The reality that God is in control and it will all work out in the long run, doesn’t discount the pain we feel here and now.
God understands how terrible and painful dealing with death can be. We get a good example of how God views death from John 11:1-44 when Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead.
Even before Jesus heard Lazarus was sick, He knew He would raise Lazarus from the dead. He says in John 11:4, “...’This sickness will not end in death. No, it is for God’s glory so that God’s Son may be glorified through it’” (NIV). Lazarus’ death and resurrection were part of the plan so that people could know Jesus was God and had power over death.
Jesus even took His time traveling to Lazarus to make sure Lazarus would be dead when he got there. When Jesus finally arrived He explained the situation in John 11:25-26. It says, “Jesus told her (Martha), “I am the resurrection and the life. Anyone who believes in me will live, even after dying. Everyone who lives in me and believes in me will never ever die. Do you believe this, Martha?” (NIV).
“Jesus Wept” by James Tissot
Jesus could have healed Lazarus before he died. But He chose to let him die. And Jesus knew He would be raising Lazarus from the dead. Yet, when Jesus stood in front of His friend’s tomb--He still wept. Jesus cried because of the pain and suffering death was causing the people He cared about. Even though Jesus knew death was not the end, Lazarus’ family and friend did not know and their pain was very vivid. Jesus hated seeing them in pain and empathized with the sorrow they were feeling, so, in that moment, Jesus wept.
God does not like to see his people struggle. He does not like to see His creations decay and die. But death is a direct result of free will. And free will is necessary if we are going to have any sort of real and valuable relationship with God. This is because you cannot force someone to love you; they have to have the ability to choose love all on their own.
All this to say--If Jesus can weep at Lazarus’ tomb, then of course we can mourn our own losses.
Unfortunately, God did not promise us easy lives.
Throughout the Bible God constantly refers to life as being hard. However, He did make us some promises:
He promises to be by our sides and help us through the pain.
Isaiah 41:13 (NIV) For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.
Psalm 54:4 (NASB) Behold, God is my helper; The Lord is the sustainer of my soul.
Psalm 118:6 (NASB) The Lord is for me; I will not fear; What can man do to me?
1 Peter 5:10 (NIV) And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.
God also promises that death is not the end--it’s only the beginning. And people who have accepted Jesus as their Savior can look forward to an amazing afterlife.
John 11:25-26 (NIV) Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?”
1 Corinthians 15:42-44 (NIV) So will it be with the resurrection of the dead. The body that is sown is perishable, it is raised imperishable; it is sown in dishonor, it is raised in glory; it is sown in weakness, it is raised in power; and it is sown a natural body, it is raised a spiritual body. If there is a natural body, there is also a spiritual body.
Revelations 21:4 (NIV) He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death' or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.
Christians are called to have an eternal perspective.
Losing people to death is the greatest struggle this life throws at us. Mourning their loss and feeling the pain is healthy and normal. Even Jesus allowed Himself to weep over death. But death does not discount the existence of God. It only reinforces our need for Him. We should lean on God in times of trouble, because He wants to help us through them. Turning away from Him, and facing the pain alone, will only make it harder. And in the end, remember, you will see your loved ones again. I will see my father again. And the time spent without them in this life will feel like a tiny blip compared to the everlasting life that is to come on the other side of death.
2 Corinthians 4:17-18 (NIV) For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
Romans 14:8 (NIV) If we live, we live for the Lord; and if we die, we die for the Lord. So, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord.
Romans 8:18 (NLT) Yet what we suffer now is nothing compared to the glory he will reveal to us later.
This series of blog posts titled, “Holding on to Reason”, is named after Amanda’s favorite C.S. Lewis quote: “Faith is the art of holding on to things your reason has once accepted, in spite of your changing moods.”